Too late for a sorry

How do I say sorry?
I find it hard to say,
I see it written,
We’ll never be the same.
How I wish for the things to fall back,
I know our life won’t be back on the track,
And I know, it was all my mistake,
This smile I have, no longer can I fake,
I need to find a window,
To crawl out of my misery,
And if I don’t find you,
Have mercy and just kill me.

How do I say sorry?
How do I make it right?
It plagues my sunshine,
And putrefies my nights.
And every moment I live,
I breathe in my death,
If you don’t trust me,
Come kiss me, feel my breath,
I need to find a road,
To drive away from pain,
And if I don’t reach you,
Wipe me away like a stain.

Yes I am sorry,
But words I fail to say,
Your angry eyes,
Bury me in my shame,
I try to find,
A way to plead, A way to die,
Is all that I need,
A way to say, How sorry I feel,
A way to die, Yes, I really need.